achieving even higher standards

A common trait that I often see in clients is that they are pretty good at self-recrimination and especially so when they hold high standards, for themselves as well as the people they work with.

Yet, as individuals, we all perform at our best and to a higher standard when we are given praise and acknowledgement. We want to feel of value, and we want to be valued. Perhaps it is because we learned that we had to be modest, that we have a tendency to discount praise and acknowledgement, with words along the lines of, "Oh, it was easy. Anyone could have done it."

Whatever the reasons, we must learn to accept acknowledgement and acknowledge ourselves more, and then to do the same with others.

We often fear that if we start acknowledging and stop recriminating, standards will drop. So why is it then that when we want animals and young children to behave better or to improve, we praise them and encourage them, and do the exact opposite with adults?

As adults, our needs are no different to when we were children. We still want to be accepted and appreciated, and we still also want to be included.

Be More Inclusive and Lavish with Your Praise

People enjoy other people taking an interest in them, so cultivate your own level of interest in other people too. Ask them about themselves and be interested in what they have to say. Build trust and rapport.

Hold regular team meetings and also make it a point to connect regularly with the people you work with on an individual basis. Remember too that they are multi-faceted human beings and that work is not necessarily the only possible avenue for conversation.

Communicate and keep them fully informed on anything that affects them in their roles. Keeping people in the dark only fuels rumours and is demoralising.

Give Positive Feedback

People also want to know how they're doing. They want to grow and improve, and they also want to be proud of their successes. The more feedback you give, the better. It is also important for feedback to be positive.

There will be times when feedback is needed to indicate a required improvement. The tendency is usually to say something like, "You did a good job BUT... ". However, what this conveys is, "I really mean that you haven’t done a good job and I'm only trying to soften it".

So, instead, frame your feedback in a positive way by using a technique called the Feedback Sandwich. There are three elements to the Feedback Sandwich.

(1) Positive opening and providing specific feedback – "John, you did a great job with Mr Jones earlier, because you went one step further than he had requested, to find out the exact situation with his order."

(2) The incremental message – "For the next time, what would make it even better is for you to also ensure that you make a record on our system to track the interaction you had with Mr Jones, and to note the outcome of your conversation with him. That way, someone else will be able to pick up with Mr Jones seamlessly, should Mr Jones call again in your absence. It will help us to give our customers like Mr Jones a better customer experience."

(3) Overall positive summation – "Keep up the good work. Good initiative."

Do you get the idea? Practice with it. It may feel awkward to begin with. However, you will find your own words and it will feel much more comfortable then.

Start with yourself. Stop the self-recrimination and feast on a Feedback Sandwich instead.

Consider this Principle

We are responsible for our experience.

Action Points

1. Hold regular team meetings to share information and to also receive feedback and comments. Involve everyone.

2. Look for opportunities to give positive feedback and acknowledge your people. Help them to feel better about themselves and their work.

3. Remember to start with and include yourself!

Quote

"Positive feedback is the breakfast of champions." – Ken Blanchard

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