are you listening to me?

The interesting thing about listening is that most of us think that we do it, yet, many employees say that the managers in their organisation don’t listen.

Why Listen?

Poor listening can lead to expensive mistakes and wasted time and resources. Effective listening is an essential element of good communication.

It is a key skill that can impact directly on the profits of a company. It assists with customer and staff retention, and improves relationships.

Everyone wants to feel important – whether they are a team member, customer, colleague or member of your family. Active listening says, "You are important and I value your comments and ideas". It makes a profound statement that the person speaking is of such importance to you that they take precedence over your time.

Active listening allows you to:

• Enable the other person to feel valued and heard
• Build rapport and lower resistance
• Learn about the other person
• Listen for both verbal and non-verbal content
• Discover what the issues or problems are
• Gather ideas
• Obtain valuable feedback
• Understand what is important
• Deliver what the other person wants and/or needs
• Give and gain respect

Improvement does not come from formal feedback sessions but from supporting and educating people.

Research shows that engaged employees make for engaged customers thereby leading to sustainable growth and real profit increase. A working environment must therefore be created in order to engage employees. This means creating an environment where people enjoy their work, have a certain level of autonomy, and can experience challenge growth.

What is Active Listening?

One of the stumbling blocks which hinders us from listening actively, is time. Most of us feel rushed and under pressure. We attempt to multi-task, listening while doing something else, and often it feels easier to jump in with an apparent solution, rather than taking precious time out to listen attentively. Whilst it may not be your intention, this sends out a sub-conscious message that you are too busy to pay due attention to the person who is speaking.

To actively listen, we must put aside any pre-judgments and opinions, and hold back on jumping in with a solution before the other person has finished speaking. It means putting aside our personal agenda in the moment, to allow space for the possibility of change – for new ideas, input and considerations – and to give the other person space to speak. This often means keeping silent!

How do you Make the Space for Active Listening?

Effective and active listening requires effort and practice. It will probably feel like a challenge to begin with. So the question is, "How important do you think active listening is, and what impact do you think it could have on your sales, staff and customer relations, productivity, effectiveness and so on?"

Do you think that it is important enough to invest the time and effort to reap the rewards?

Sometimes you may just choose to "W-A-I-T" – asking yourself, "Why Am I Talking?" As the saying goes, we’ve been given two ears and one mouth to be used in that proportion.

So, take a breath, sit back and listen. You may just be pleasantly surprised by how much you learn.

Consider this Principle

What we give out, we get back.

Action Points

1. Make a commitment to listen actively. Put aside distractions and give them your full attention.

2. Encourage the other person to talk. Develop open-ended phrases and questions that stimulate listening - "Go on", "Tell me more", "Then what happens?", "What else?"

3. Give them feedback. Make eye contact and show them in your facial expressions or small verbal communications that you are listening.

4. Reflect and paraphrase back to confirm that you have heard and understood them correctly.

5. Listen to both what they are saying as well as any non-verbal communication. Listen for fact and feelings.

6. If you feel that you just aren’t able to listen actively at that moment, ask them how much time they think they would need and schedule in a specific time for later.

Quote

"For every minute a salesperson spends listening, he or she will save four minutes overcoming objections." - Bill Acheson, communications department at the University of Pittsburgh

"When people talk, listen completely. Most people never listen." - Ernest Hemingway

"Listen regularly to customers and employees. Create an atmosphere of utmost trust and credibility. Employees have to know that every decision, direction and redirection is for the Greater Good. You need that level of trust to change the direction of the company on a dime, which in this business, you sometimes need to do." - Dave Sharkey, Pres. & COO, Electric Lightwave, Inc.

"One often hears the remark ‘He talks too much,’ but when did anyone last hear the criticism ‘He listens too much’?" - Norm Augustine, former CEO of Martin Marietta

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